This has been a super busy week, and next week isn’t looking much better, so I wanted to chat about something fun this week. My obsession with Dateline. Or 20/20. Or 48 Hours. Or Forensic Files. Basically any real life crime show involving murder. I love it. I cannot get enough of it. I spend way to much time watching those shows. While I’m working I usually have them on YouTube just playing in the background. I literally almost cannot fall asleep before someone is murdered.
So yeah. That is weird, but it gets weirder. I cannot tolerate sad shows or movies. Zero tolerance. I have enough reasons to cry in this life. I certainly don’t need anyone or anything adding fuel to that fire. So, while I avoid ANYTHING sad, I must watch EVERYTHING horrifying. Which got me to thinking. Why don’t I think people getting murdered is sad? How can this dichotomy exist inside me?
I have often struggled with showing emotions. My family and friends joke that my heart, much like the Grinch’s is two sizes too small. But this seems to be taking it to a new level. I’m not saying I would kill you, hide your body and get away with it. But I’m pretty sure I could.
It makes me wonder about violence in video games promoting violent behavior, which I think is absolute bullshit, btw. But do I accept that we have been desensitized to violence in media? Sure. Then why haven’t we been desensitized to sad stuff? Or maybe we have…..
Bottom line, I’m hoping I never find myself in a situation where I’m trying to cover up a crime. Maybe I wish I had gone into forensics or police work. Maybe I just find it fascinating how truly fucked up the world can be. No matter what, I’m not watching Dumbo unless at gun point.